Sunday 21 August 2011

YouTube Transcriptions: JeremyJahns' 'The Help' Review


“Good old Mississippi.  It’s everything I remember it being...from every other movie that takes place in Mississippi! 

‘The Help’: So ‘The Help’ stars Emma Stone and it takes place in Mississippi – a place made famous by Mark Twain and blatant racism.  And Emma Stone, she’s a writer, and she’s not like the other, you know, uppity chicks of Mississippi.  Mainly Bryce Dallas Howard, which is funny ’cause you think to yourself, “Ah, the battle of the Gwen Stacys”.  Emma Stone sees how house maids are treated down there, and Emma Stone’s like “Ehhhh…this is bull****; they don’t get treated like people”.  And it’s totally true!  I mean they get paid like a hundred bucks a month to cook and clean after White people.  Which sucks because, I mean, we’re really sloppy people.  We’re messy, we’re needy.  I would never take that job, like ever in a million years.  And it’s not just one of those “work sucks” kind of scenarios; I mean, they’re actually abused.  They’re mentally abused, they’re belittled; they have to use different bathrooms.  So you’re like, “I like the depiction of the 60’s better in ‘X Men: First Class’”.  And no one ever does anything about it or says anything about it because it’s actually illegal to print anything that says, “White people and Black people are actually equals”.  And so Emma Stone’s like, “You know what?  Their story should be published and told; I’m gonna write about them so people know”.  I mean, after all, as a wise man once said, “We must all make the choice between what is right and what is easy” – Albus Dumbledore (and probably a few other people who were actually real).  It’s gonna make her a lot of enemies, yeah, but it’s gonna make her a few friends too.  Now, I really like this movie.  I didn’t think I would ’cause I heard the movie was just about some chick who writes about other chicks, and I was just like, “I’m not gonna relate to this movie at all”.  But it’s really not an accurate description of the movie.  I liked this movie because of what I hate – ‘n’ I hate apathy.  I hate it when people just sit by and just watch *****y things happen to people.  I mean, just take action.  People don’t take action as much as you think they probably should.  So Emma Stone’s like, “You know what?  I’m gonna be the person that takes action”.  And I like that.  Immediately I’m like, “All right, I’m into this movie”.  It’s a well-written movie; it’s a well acted movie; the characters I really like too.  ’Cause one of the house maids that Emma Stone befriends, she’s really nice; she’s really quiet.  She’s the first one that’s kinda like, “All right, I’ll tell you my story as long as you never tell anyone I told you”.  It is Mississippi in the 60’s.  That’s not exactly paradise.  And the other one Emma Stone befriends, she is the one; she’ll tell you how it is.  And she can’t keep her mouth shut, so she usually gets fired.  I liked her; she was awesome.  Now although you can’t say this movie is bad at all – ’cause you can’t – you can say it is very long.  When I was watching this movie, I was like, “This is like the kind of movie that high school teachers force their high school students to watch so high school students call that time nap time”.  I mean, it’s a character-based literary period piece – it’s not gonna appeal to everybody.  However, I think those people, in time – like when they’re in their twenties and what not – they’ll appreciate this movie.  You know, when they actually have to think about real world kinda ****.  I mean, it’s funny, because I didn’t think the movie was too long for what it was.  I can’t think of a part in the movie where I’m like, “Oh, that…that clearly dragged on; they should’ve just cut that out”.   So apparently two hours and twenty minutes is what the movie needs to be.  Doesn’t change the fact that it’s a two hour and twenty minute Drama.  And if you’re in high school and your teacher forces you to watch this, and you actually don’t sleep through the class, you’ll actually like it.  So I will say, it’s a good time; no alcohol required.  I mean, I laughed; I got attached to the characters; I…you know, didn’t cry.  Kinda wanted to, though.  It’s touching in parts; I ain’t apologisin’!  So since I have an insane amount of ADD, I’m not gonna jump up to the opportunity to watch a two and a half hour Drama like every day, but I watched it today and I’m glad I did.  So are you gonna see ‘The Help’?  Have you seen ‘The Help’?  Comment below; let me know what you thought about it.  It’s gonna be all chick comments at that point.  ’Cause guys if you didn’t know what ‘The Help’ was; don’t worry, I didn’t until like forty eight hours ago.  In any case, if you like what you’ve seen here and you wanna see more, click right here to see more!”

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